Non Violent Communication - A Somatic Public Health Perspective Better than Psychedelic Therapy

The oxytocin is palpable.   The neural purring audible.   The co-regulation imprints.

 Given the worldwide popularity, there are many who agree that sitting in an NVC group is a rare oasis of living peace.

 As a Somatic practitioner and a proud active member of the Contact Improvisation (CI) Community, I spend much of my professional and personal life in sensory guidance.  It is, however, the coming together of the verbal and non-verbal which offers the most meaning to me.

 My understanding of the pure physiology of both experiences – verbal and non-verbal connection – is the intimacy which arises through trust and openness, leading to an increased oxytocic state of endogenous ecstasy.

Endogenous means produced by your own body, as opposed to produced in a laboratory.

While psychedelic-assisted therapy is on the rise, it’s my proposal that endogenous-oxytocin, stimulated by Presence-Based Practices, such as NVC and CI offers a sustainable solution to a range of social-emotional and physical conditions, from both a symptomatic and causal, individual and social perspective.

“I could not be in the world in the same way.  Loud noises, too many people, being too far away from home would all induce anxiety or panic…As B’s PTSD intensified, her world shrank.  She avoided any potential triggers but the triggers kept growing so her world kept shrinking….Less than an hour after swallowing the pill…she is visualising scenes of metaphorical importance.  All seem to provide her with an enhanced perspective about her untapped trauma and how to deal with it.” [The Australian April 26-27]

The article goes on “data to back claims for or against the long-term results of psychedelic therapy…is scant”

While not against Psychedelic-assited therapy, a common-sense public health approach for change at the sociological level, would be the introduction of Presence-based Practices, amongst organisations, professions and populations in which trauma and burnout are common, such as law, medicine, education and politics.

My observation of the global NVC Community, unfortunately, is that the energy and drive exceeds the efficacy of organisational cohesion and measurable outcomes.

So, here, are my top three pointers for embodying NVC collectively as a more sustainable public health measure than psychedelic therapy:

1.        NVC is Primarily a Sociological Practice

How do we measure sociological change?  What indicators are we seeking?

Do we use data like the number of visits to the NVC Australia website?

Can we thematically analyse the number of publications which mention NonViolent Communication?

Do we trial a #NVC campaign and measure social shares?

If we were met with crisis, such as an oligarchic-attempt at world supremacy, how quickly could our network mobilise collectively?

Our strength as a whole lies in our agreed strategy.   Didn’t Rosenberg intend this to save time and enhance efficacy?  To achieve outcomes more directly?

 By holding the frame “greater than me”, we can harness the Socio-Cultural wind speed and wave height of NVC.

2.        Speak to Honour rather than Convert

Many recipients of your oxytocic offering will never know the source of your golden glowing.   Strangers who receive your kindness in the after-glow of a juicy dyad.    The cat who recognised your softness having been held by an NVC group practice.

Most of us, during our own “conversion” become missionary-style preachers to unassailing bystanders, not doing ourselves, nor Rosenberg, any favours.

We are best in, over these first few years, to practice, practice, practice, and let bystanders stand by…with growing intrigue for the mysterious prowess.

Like calligraphers, martial artists, indigenous keepers of lore, and philosophers, we preserve the practice from day one, by holding our teachers as sacred beloveds.

3.        Integration, Shared Purpose & Motivational Collaboration

"If you are working on something that you really care about, you don't have to be pushed. The vision pulls you" - Steve Jobs

 I write to synthesise what appear to be disparate parts of my life.   I play in the “liminal”, working in a Medical Centre practicing emerging-evidence.   I bring science to artists.  I talk finance with hippies.  I’m attracted to what I don’t understand.   I am curious to comprehend the incomprehensible. 

In an ecosystem, the challenges caused by complexity, ambiguity and diversity at the interface evokes evolution (just ask Darwin).   To cross-pollinate NVC with your chosen profession, with your favourite arts, with your daily routines, is to evolve the practice as Rosenberg intended.

While a Yin-only approach to NVC translates as a relational orgy without the climax, a more motivational-approach (think Motivational Interviewing in which a patient’s own thought-process progresses) with measurable indicators (think the UN’s SDGs) and outcomes (think Organisational KPIs) will facilitate the wild-fire through pre-existing means.

 Shared purpose is facilitated by shared language, as those of us who “speak NVC” will agree.  Isn’t it time we translated our beloved teacher’s vocabulary and grammar, to the languages of science and finance, harnessing the wind speed and wave height of pre-existing structures, and seeing fruition of the vision intended to be.

NVC is a four-step formula proposed by Marshall Rosenberg for avoiding or resolving conflict by taking responsibility for our experiences and cultivating what he called “natural giving”.

My experience of NVC is primarily via my dear friend, Rachel Hannam, who practiced under the guidance of her respected teacher Roberts Gonzales, a student of Marshall Rosenberg.

For the last 4 years, she and I have held an NVC group practice and attended an NVC Retreat for trainers. In the last 12 months I’ve sat in weekly NVC practice groups online. 

This has been an immersive experience in what I can best describe as meeting  a lifelong longing for community through trust, non-judgment, belonging and mentorship. 

The hypothesis is that the benefits are mediated by oxytocin would make a meaningful Research Project, and potential PhD.  Please consider forwarding this article where it may attract further interest and conversation.